so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
this will be a night to untag.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
