i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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