yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
