I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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