so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
We had to coat check the pizza.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
