My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
