Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
