today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
