You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize
