i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
