he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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