i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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