I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
