I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
