I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
The struggles of a small town man whore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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