brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
