He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
accomplished twins. life is a go
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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