Will you blow on my dice?
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
did i just pee glitter
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
