He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
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