The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
Do vagina's smell?
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
