my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize