she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
