Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
