Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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