Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
