I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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