yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
