Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
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