I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
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You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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