He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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