I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
i wish my penis had a tongue
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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