Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
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