Don't you send me to vm
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
