Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
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