susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize