Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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