Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
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