they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
