is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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