I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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