i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
