Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
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