fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
she told me i tasted like america
This gyro tastes like lonliness
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
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