i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
