never play flip cup with pint glasses
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I just found puke in my bra..
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
