Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(818): View more from California

It's like a parade of train wrecks.

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(631): View more from New York

Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"

(631): View more from New York

I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...

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(214): View more from Texas

She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract

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Some Animals Are Total Jerks (10+ pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(651): View more from Minnesota

i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.

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(+61): View more from Australia

i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..

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(419): View more from Ohio

"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause

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(913): View more from Kansas

I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck

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