I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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