my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
