I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
we're making bets on your personal life
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
