I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
