matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
