I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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