Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I have already put on my inside pants.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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